Readers often ask me — how do you, max, take all the stories of the lovers of the Soviet Union, which is often mentioned in posts and comments? They say no one in their right mind can praise a scoop, is that drunk and remember their youth — the days when the grass was greener and water is wet and the sun is brighter and people around was somehow more impressive — and now everywhere I look, around snotty youth.
In fact, in the Internet there are many forums, sites and groups in VK and Facebook and Twitter accounts, where fans of the USSR and share their memories. “Memories” consist mainly of myths and fakes — which, like the Borges story “Ashes, Uqbar, Orbis Tertius” itself has become a separate reality existing only in the minds of the fans and the USSR. This fictional reality has nothing to do with real Soviet reality, and is nevertheless highly tenacious and stable, and unchanged roams from forum to forum.
The situation is somewhat reminiscent of role-playing tolkiyenistov — there is also a fantasy world with its own laws, rules and internal relations between the characters — the only difference is that Tolkienists realize vydumannost his world, and fans of the USSR for the most part quite seriously believe that studying the “true history”.
Why is this happening and why all this is necessary? The answer to this question is very simple — a country that has no achievements in the present and looks with fear in the illusory future — starts a desperate grasp at the past. And if in the past nothing to be proud of — it is always possible to invent, to build on the basis of certain historical scenery. Yes, it looks ridiculous and absurd — but mouse persistently continue to eat this cactus.
In today’s post I clearly show you examples of funny myths lovers of the Soviet Union, and expose them of course. Make sure you check out the article below, write in the comments your opinion, well to friends to add do not forget)
1. The myth about the most delicious ice cream.
What’s the secret to the unique taste of Soviet ice cream — as it asks us the anonymous author, as it asks. And then gives his own answer — it’s all in the cruelest Guest, who was one of the toughest in the world. Apparently, each offender the magic of the Soviet GOST immediately imprisoned, and a good third of the four million denunciations, written by Soviet citizens, were referred to improper compliance with this standard.
In fact, the secret to “the unique taste of Soviet ice cream” is extremely simple — it simply stood out for its taste among the rest of the miserable meal — edinsvennoe competition of the Soviet ice cream was icicles. Furthermore, the Soviet ice cream was not really any “Soviet” — the recipe, the technology and even equipment for production in the USSR has brought Anastas Mikoyan — this happened in 1936. So, a fan of the Soviet Union, remember, praising the best in the world of Soviet ice cream, you pour water on the mill American sharks of capitalism.
2. The myth of the absence of crime.
This myth somehow always relayed in the same form, supposedly all in the USSR, kept the keys under the doormat, and theft in the country did not exist. Here, of course, you can make a joke about what the poor have to steal to begin with there is nothing (that, in principle, be true), but more interesting is that the assertion about the alleged “lack of crime” in the scoop — is an outright lie.
At the end of 1980-ies the Soviet Union occupied the fifth mustoe in the world on the prevalence of murder — in this parameter it surpassed the developed European countries more than 12 times. Also, the Soviet Union has always been one of the leaders for the highest number of rape — only in 1989 and only in the RSFSR was as much as 14.6 per thousand of such crimes — which is much higher than the same indicator in developed countries. A huge part of all these serious crimes were committed in a condition of alcoholic intoxication — which was not typical for developed countries and was clean shovels result of the soldering of the population. About the Soviet maniacs I already told here.
And as the cherry on the cake — the Soviet Union was a world leader in the number of prisoners, and it affected not only the Stalinist years to the Gulag, but also of later times — for example, in 1986 on 100 thousand population had as many as 846 inmates, far exceeding the same indicator in developed countries. And Yes, the keys under the Mat lay.
3. The myth of Soviet fashion.
Also very funny myth that the Soviet Union allegedly was some kind of there own “fashion”. No “Soviet fashion” was not in the fifties nor the seventies, nor the eighties — Soviet citizens are simply copied as best they could, the Western global trends in fashion (mostly European and American) — I alter clothes under pictures from “Burda”.
The author writes about some “individual characteristics” — that’s about it-and it is worth mentioning in more detail. “Individual characteristics” Soviet fashion was the fact that in order to fashionable dress, to the Soviet citizen had to go to the black marketeers , often with risk to his career (because this behavior was considered “unworthy”) and paying a lot of money. Unfortunate jeans “Montana” in the seventies in the USSR was worth the black marketeers 200-250 rubles — almost two average salaries, the money they were going for months, if not years. Here such so to say “individual characteristics” overgrown Soviet fashion.
4. The myth of the Soviet cars.
This is perhaps the most ridiculous. Supposedly the “thaw” ordinary Soviet citizens could afford to buy on ZIL-111. By the way, it’s suddenly about “the thaw” I remembered what it was thawed and “uttalelse” if everything is so good, and even the ice cream was done according to the most severe Standards? And what is the ZIL was to “buy” his gift is all handed out three pieces, and if you defeat all three, or for example an ashtray clogged in one of them — ten top free datut, communism had almost come.
But seriously — the ordinary Soviet person to buy a personal car was extremely difficult. It was necessary to defend the so-called “queue” (which often lasted 10-15 years), collect a sum of money (space in relation to wages), and even to humiliating the so-called “permission” — they say, power doesn’t mind you buy a car. This is what I wrote here in this post and even led there is a photo of the document razresheniya.
Well, as all of the same <s>the cherry on the cake</s> jelly beans on the cake — the picture depicts a ZIL-111, a Soviet luxury car, which was manufactured with a body “long wheelbase sedan”, “limousine” and “Phaeton” — from 1958 to 1967, was released only 112 cars, including all modifications. By the way, I believe that those 112 Soviet nomenklatura, who became owners of these cars in the “thaw” — got them without difficulty, and may even be absolutely free — at the expense of working people.
5. The myth of Soviet technology.
No, I can’t — this is probably even funnier than distributed to all the right and left of a ZIL-111. Allegedly, the Soviet Union was invented some kind of “mobile phone” — as evidence shows a box with a smaller disk from the Soviet phone.
I want to remind you that the mobile phone is not a Shaitan — box-man with wires and cogs, and a data transmission technology, including grids, substations, etc., and the actual telephone device which is max a few percent. None of this in Soviet Union was not, as rightly pointed out on Twitter — “and through which provider was Soveren first call on this mobile, in USSR-Mobile” or may be “party-Wireless?”.
The bitter truth is that the scoop is not something that the mobile and regular phones was not all. At us in Minsk the apartment of the phone appeared only in the late eighties, and in the apartment my grandmother was the so-called “paired phone” — one for two with neighbors. Pick up the phone — and there the neighbors say, then it is necessary to believe and to wait until they finish and then call. Here they are — the real Soviet telephone technology.
And Yes, the real first active mobile phone (more precisely, the device operates on the same principles) appeared in 1946 in the company of Motorola, whose work is known today. About the Soviet “experimental phones” do not know anything except muddy photos from “Science and life” and the stories that we are already on the verge of inventing and that’s something will invent.
6. The myth of the friendship of peoples.
It’s so funny it’s almost sad. I want to remind anonymous author that the Soviet of nationalities is not something that thought they were indicated in the passport. It is the “passport nationality,” which, as a brand, put on the person of the Soviet state — was in many cases the collapse of the life and professional career, as for example there was a ban on the receipt by the Jews of certain specialnote. In people, this was widely known and went under the name “not because he took the fifth paragraph” — under item number five, the nationality indicated in the passport.
Scoop, there were many domestic conflicts on a national basis and widespread domestic anti-Semitism — the eyes of the Soviet people were trained on the “definition of a Jew” the shape of the nose or the degree of curl of the hair, and such people often became targets of persecution. For fun, ask around among friends of the Jews, from which they or their parents fled from the Soviet Union after it became possible.
Finally, the Soviet “friendship of Nations” was clearly visible in the Soviet army, where everything was divided into “national groups”, “svoyachestva” and other warring groups. The Armenians did not like the Azeris, Caucasians tried to subjugate the Slavs, and all together not like the Muscovites are the realities of the Soviet army until the last days of the Union.
7. The myth of respect.
Consider the hostility and unwillingness to have any contact what sort of “respect” may be the only one who grew up in a tragic family where the father beat the mother in such families, the myths in the style of “beats it means love”, “beats means respect” and stuff like that — simply because no such myth-making surrounding reality would be absolutely terrible and hopeless, so the compensatory function of the consciousness. Later this mythological vision of the world extends to the relations between the two countries.
The attitude of the developed countries to the USSR oharakterizovat phrase “fastidious disdain and pity”. With contemptuous disdain of the Communist authorities (the leadership of which consisted basically entirely of murderers and liars), and with pity — duped and robbing people. The Soviet Union tried not to angeras he had nuclear weapons and inadequate people in power, but no one came to consider it a “respect”.
In General, the situation is reminiscent of that, as if you are in a dark room pull a drunk guy with a knife and breathing garlic fumes in your face, asks, “do you respect me?” I think you will not argue with him and provoke conflict is easier to say “respect” and go on his way. But no one will consider this a respect…
Such cases. As you can see — describe me are fans of the USSR do exist and with a persistence worthy of a better cause, spread their myths.
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